Me? Submit to HIM??

Pastor Don Carpenter / General

Some Assembly Required / Family; Wives in Ephesus; Submission / Ephesians 5:22–24; 1 Peter 3:1–6

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, “What are the grounds for your divorce?”

She replied, “About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.”

“No,” he said, “I mean what is the foundation of this case?”

“It is made of concrete, brick and mortar,” she responded.

“I mean,” he continued, “What are your relations like?”

“I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband’s parents.”

He said, “Do you have a real grudge?”

“No,” she replied, “We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one.”

“Please,” he tried again, “is there any infidelity in your marriage?”

“Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don’t necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes.”

“Ma’am, does your husband ever beat you up?”

“Yes,” she responded, “about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do.”

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, “Lady, why do you want a divorce?”

“Oh, I don’t want a divorce,” she replied. “I’ve never wanted a divorce.

My husband does. He said he can’t communicate with me.”

This evening we are continuing our series on the family entitled “Some Assembly Required”  Tonight we cover that often misunderstood and misused concept of wives submitting to their husbands.  As we have read … it is in there…  but how can this be?  Husbands can be boneheads at times!  Tonight we are going to study the Word and discover that there is a very sound answer when an exasperated wife asks “Me? Submit to HIM???”

Ephesians 5:22 KJV

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

hupotasso (????????)= primarily a military term, “to rank under” (hupo, “under,” tasso, “to arrange”), denotes (a) “to put in subjection, to subject”

“Wives, obey your husbands.” Submit is a very mild word. It is a loving word. It means to respond to your own husband as unto the Lord. The way we respond to the Lord is that we love Him because He first loved us.1

1 J. Vernon McGee

Submit to Him Because it is Good For You.

Ephesians 5:23 KJV

For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

•    He is there for your guidance

1 Corinthians 14:35 KJV

And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.

•    He is there for your protection

Ephesians 5:25 KJV

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

•    He is there for your purity

Ephesians 5:26 KJV

That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,

Ephesians 5:27 KJV

That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

•    He must give an account to Christ for how he led you.

Hebrews 13:17 KJV

Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you.

John 17:12 KJV

While I was with them in the world, I kept them in thy name: those that thou gavest me I have kept, and none of them is lost, but the son of perdition; that the scripture might be fulfilled.

A little boy finally sat down after first resisting his parents’ command to do so. He said to his parents, “I’m sitting down on the outside, but I’m standing up on the inside.

Michael P. Green, 1500 Illustrations for Biblical Preaching (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2000), 26.

Submit to Him Because it is Good for the Church

•    Believers are joined to Christ

Ephesians 5:30 KJV

For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

•    Wives are joined to their Husband

Ephesians 5:31 KJV

For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

Your marriage is a picture of the mysterious union between Christ and the Church.

Submit to Him Because it is Good for Him

•    Win him without words

1 Peter 3:1 KJV

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament based on Semantic Domains 41.3 ?????; ?????, ??; ????????????; ?????????, ??

?????; ?????, ?? f; ????????????; ?????????, ?? f: to conduct oneself, with apparent focus upon overt daily behavior

** Translated 13 times “Conversation” in the King James

•    Win him with your manner of life

1 Peter 3:2 KJV

While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.

1 Peter 3:3 KJV

Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;

1 Peter 3:4 KJV

But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.

•    Win him like Holy women of old did.

1 Peter 3:5 KJV

For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:

1 Peter 3:6 KJV

Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.


A poll was taken a few years ago asking, both men and women this question, “Should wives submit to their husbands?”

(In 1998, the Southern Baptists also sparked controversy with their statement that wives should “submit graciously” to the “servant leadership” of their husbands. At that time, when asked if they concurred with that statement exactly as quoted, 69% of the public disagreed.)

Wow, nearly 70% disagree with what the Bible teaches.

Its one thing for the unchurched and Biblically ignorant… but those of us who have been paying attention now know the answer to the question: “Me, submit to HIM?”….  YES You… YES to Him.

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