Matthew 19:1-12
Preached Sunday Morning, March 8, 2009
Introduction:
What exactly is marriage? What makes it binding? Over half of marriages today end in divorce. What about remarriage? These questions foster much discussion and debate among Bible believing Christians.
The issue was also a hot topic during Jesus’ day. The Pharisees wanted to trap Jesus by discussing this controversial issue. Perhaps Jesus would utter a quotable sound bite that would serve as a tool with which to discredit Him. In response to their question, Jesus gave some very clear and concise teaching. This morning let us set aside our own personal feelings and traditions and discover from God’s perfect and preserved word, the King James Bible, a biblical understanding of Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage.
I. The Purpose of Marriage
Matthew 19:3-5
3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? 4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
A. God made humans to be male and female. This was his plan for companionship and pro-creation.
B. It is not generally good for man to be alone.
Genesis 2:18-20
18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. 19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. 20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
C. God designs a woman specifically for a man.
Genesis 2:21-23
21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. 23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
D. God’s perfect plan is a life-long marriage between one man and one woman.
Genesis 2:24-25
24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
1. Leave their parents
2. Stick to each other
3. Become one flesh
1 Corinthians 7:1-2
Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
Hebrews 13:4
4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
4. Reflect a picture of Christ’s love for the Church.
Ephesians 5:22-27
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
E. Marriage is a public and binding covenant.
Malachi 2:14-16
14 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. 15 And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. 16 For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.
II. The Provision of Divorce
Matthew 19:6-8
6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
A. Something that is one flesh should not be divided.
B. Moses did allow for divorce.
Deuteronomy 24:1
When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house.
C. This provision was only made to deal with man’s intense depravity.
D. Divorce was never intended to be part of God’s perfect plan.
1. Love is a commitment, not just a feeling
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
2. To end a marriage is to break a covenant
3. Divorce should never be considered by Christians as a way to resolve a love grown cold
4. “You deserve to be happy” is an empty thought because God’s perfect plan for your happiness is a life long marriage.
III. The Prohibition of Remarriage
Matthew 19:9-12
9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. 10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. 11 But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. 12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother’s womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
A. The General rule of marriage
1. Marriage is a life long commitment
2. If divorce happens, re-marriage should not happen because the covenant is still binding.
3. Divorced couples are to remain single as long as the spouse is alive.
B. The exception to the rule
1. If a divorce is caused by infidelity, the offended spouse is not only allowed to divorce, but also to remarry.
2. If an unbeliever leaves a believer over their faith – remarriage is allowed, not encouraged.
1 Corinthians 7:13-15
13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
1 Corinthians 7:27-28
27 Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife. 28 But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.