{"id":1493,"date":"2022-08-24T12:29:52","date_gmt":"2022-08-24T17:29:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/?p=1493"},"modified":"2022-08-24T12:29:52","modified_gmt":"2022-08-24T17:29:52","slug":"answer-softly","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/?p=1493","title":{"rendered":"Answer Softly"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Answer Softly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pastor Don Carpenter<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Soul Winning: So Much More Than Evangelism \/ Anger \/ Proverbs 15:1\u20132<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While church planting in Washington State, I worked as a Transitional Housing Coordinator with Inland Counseling Center, a Mental Health Provider.  It was a wonderful place to work because they not only gave me a chance to reach a very needy population, they also were a teaching facility for those pursuing their Masters of Social Work Degree. We were constantly learning the newest and latest techniques in the Mental Health counseling field.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Every once and a while, a staff member would be spotlighted for doing something right so that others can learn from it. One Wednesday staff meeting I was surprised to find myself in that spotlight. Apparently a Nurse was listening outside my closed door as I was counseling with an angry client with a history of physical violence. You see he was getting real loud and on the edge of a temper tantrum because I would not give him more money than was in his budget. He had a history of drug abuse. I met his aggressive and violent voice with a calm and tender answer. Soon his speech matched mine and the situation was under control.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhere did you learn Pace and Lead?\u201d the nurse asked. I explained that it was not a new technique, it was Proverbs 15.1-2 that I was implementing. The entire staff learned that day that what was just being discovered, God had told us about in the Bible thousands of years ago. It is a profound thing to learn to Answer Softly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Today is our fourth lesson on Soul Winning. Remember, to win a soul is to capture a mind and heart and grab hold of it. The Bible tells us that when a righteous person does so for righteous purposes, it is a demonstration of wisdom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proverbs 11:30<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life; And he that winneth souls is wise.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

We learned that the evidence of righteous motivation is seen not in an external check list of appearance standards arbitrarily made up but rather a Biblical list of character traits that will accompany righteous wisdom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

James 3:17\u201318<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

We went on to learn that to win a soul we needed to always speak graciously – with unmerited favor. We also needed to add a little salt to make one thirsty for the truth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Colossians 4:5\u20136<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Last week we learned that not only do we need to be gracious in our speech when dealing with outsiders, but we need to teach with gentle meekness when addressing believers who have lost their way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2 Timothy 2:23\u201326<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

But foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth; <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tonight we will address how to respond when things get heated. We will see that when we face an increasing volume and rising anger, we must be disciplined to Answer Softly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Soft Answer Puts Wrath In Reverse<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/em>Proverbs 15:1<\/em> (KJV)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 A soft answer turneth away wrath…<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 A soft answer turns away wrath: Soft in relation to speech means \u201cgentle,\u201d \u201ckind,\u201d or, as reb says, \u201cmild.\u201d It is a response without anger or harshness. The importance of kindness and respect in the use of speech is expressed again in 24:26 and 25:15.1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (2000). A handbook on Proverbs (pp. 326\u2013328). United Bible Societies<\/p>\n\n\n\n

J Vernon McGee makes the following observation:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 I\u2019m sure that the people who come to your mind at this proverb are Abigail and Nabal. We have seen several proverbs that are applicable to them. Abigail was the beautiful, lovely wife and woman. Nabal, her husband, was the fool but a very rich man. Someone has written a book called \u201cBeauty and the Beast,\u201d and it is the story of Nabal and Abigail\u2014Abigail is the beauty and Nabal is the beast. You will recall that when Abigail heard that her husband had sent an insulting answer to David, who had in kindness and consideration taken care of his flocks, she hurriedly ordered the servants to gather a great deal of food for David. Then she went to meet David and fell down on her face before him. She recognized him as the future king, and she spoke to him of the fact that his life was bound up in the bundle of life with God\u2014a beautiful expression. She gave a soft answer, and it did turn away wrath. On the other hand, grievous words stir up anger\u2014which certainly was true of the words of Nabal.1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 McGee, J. V. (1991). Thru the Bible commentary: Poetry (Proverbs) (electronic ed., Vol. 20, p. 132). Thomas Nelson.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Samuel 25:23<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And when Abigail saw David, she hasted, and lighted off the ass, and fell before David on her face, and bowed herself to the ground,<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Samuel 25:32\u201333<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And David said to Abigail, Blessed be the LORD God of Israel, which sent thee this day to meet me: <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And blessed be thy advice, and blessed be thou, which hast kept me this day from coming to shed blood, and from avenging myself with mine own hand.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Kings 12:7<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And they spake unto him, saying, If thou wilt be a servant unto this people this day, and wilt serve them, and answer them, and speak good words to them, then they will be thy servants for ever.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proverbs 14:3<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the mouth of the foolish is a rod of pride: But the lips of the wise shall preserve them.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proverbs 25:15<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

By long forbearing is a prince persuaded, And a soft tongue breaketh the bone.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Turns away translates the causative form of a verb meaning \u201cto turn back.\u201d The thought is that the anger of the first speaker can be set aside or calmed by a gentle response.1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (2000). A handbook on Proverbs (p. 328). United Bible Societies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Wrath is anger or fury. cev says \u201cA kind answer soothes angry feelings,\u201d and spcl has \u201cA friendly reply calms anger.\u201d In some languages it may be necessary to expand this line to say, for example, \u201cReply to a person with gentle words and you will calm their anger.\u201d1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (2000). A handbook on Proverbs (p. 328). United Bible Societies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Harsh Words Excite Anger<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/em>Proverbs 15:1<\/em> (KJV)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 …But grievous words stir up anger.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stirs up or \u201cexcites\u201d contrasts with turns away in the first line. The verb refers to causing something to rise, in this case the angry emotions of the other speaker, as reb says: \u201cbut a sharp word makes tempers rise.\u201d gecl translates this full saying \u201cA reconciling answer cools down anger, but a hurtful word heats it up.\u201d See also tev.1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (2000). A handbook on Proverbs (p. 328). United Bible Societies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Wise Tongue Uses Knowledge Correctly.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/em>Proverbs 15:2<\/em> (KJV)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright…<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge: The Hebrew of this line, as the rsv footnote shows, has \u201cmakes knowledge good\u201d in place of dispenses knowledge. However, hottp rates the text as \u201cA\u201d and interprets the line as \u201cThe tongue of the wise adorns knowledge.\u201d The tongue of the wise refers to the speech or teaching given by the wise, as in tev. tev follows the recommendation of hottp with \u201cmake knowledge attractive.\u201d We may also translate this line, for example, \u201cThe speech of the wise ones makes knowledge lovely,\u201d \u201cKnowledge is made beautiful in the words of wise people,\u201d or \u201cWhen a wise man talks, everybody is glad and wants to know more.\u201d1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (2000). A handbook on Proverbs (p. 328). United Bible Societies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Foolish Mouth Gushes Foolishness<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 <\/em>Proverbs 15:2<\/em> (KJV)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 …But the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proverbs 14:17<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

He that is soon angry dealeth foolishly: And a man of wicked devices is hated.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Psalm 10:4<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The wicked, through the pride of his countenance, will not seek after God: God is not in all his thoughts.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proverbs 1:7<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: But fools despise wisdom and instruction.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proverbs 1:22<\/em> KJV<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity? And the scorners delight in their scorning, And fools hate knowledge?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fools are described in 1:7 and 1:22 as people who hate wisdom and instruction. Pour out renders a verb meaning to flow or bubble up in reference to water. In relation to speech it is used figuratively to mean \u201cburst out with speech.\u201d See tev \u201cspout nonsense.\u201d One translation renders this line as \u201cbut when a fool talks, he just throws empty words around1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Reyburn, W. D., & Fry, E. M. (2000). A handbook on Proverbs (p. 328). United Bible Societies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We rarely use the word \u201cgushes\u201d for something good, whether we are speaking of blood or emotion, and this is also true when we are talking about folly. The image compares speech to water or some other rushing liquid\u2014too much spouting out too quickly, neither controlled nor contained. Knowledge, by contrast, is (lit.) \u201cmade good\u201d by the tongue of the wise, perhaps by taking the time and effort to make it attractive; when it comes out, its product is worth keeping. It comes out in moderation, not excess, so that nothing is lost.1<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1 Koptak, P. E. (2003). Proverbs (pp. 394\u2013395). Zondervan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So there it is more wisdom regarding winning a soul, or capturing a heart and mind. We will not do so by bombastic, insulting, intimidating, and bullying speech toward those who do not believe like we do. When faced with the fleshly wrath of a poor soul who has been deceived or stirred up by the forces of darkness, or angered because of mistakes we have made, do not play that game. Do not answer in kind. Continue on the path of Grace speech. Continue in the stream of unmerited favor and answer softly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Exported from Logos Bible Software, 1:23 PM August 24, 2022.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Answer Softly Pastor Don Carpenter Soul Winning: So Much More Than Evangelism \/ Anger \/ Proverbs 15:1\u20132 While church planting in Washington State, I worked as a Transitional Housing Coordinator with Inland Counseling Center, a Mental Health Provider.  It was a wonderful place to work because they not only gave me a chance to reach a … Continue reading Answer Softly<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1493","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-wednesday-evening-sermons"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1493","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1493"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1493\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1495,"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1493\/revisions\/1495"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1493"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1493"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/forum.ebcct.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1493"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}